So, after five years of BlogHer and being blessed enough to have attended all five, I realize you can always walk away from this conference having learned something.
1. Really? It doesn’t matter what you wear because people will forget unless you show up in a wedding dress or naked. Both will get you cheers and looks. As long as you are comfortable in your own skin, whatever clothes you have on will work. Most importantly, wear comfortable shoes. No matter how cute your new shoes are, you will hate them at them end of the day if your feet are bloody and blistered.
2. Decide in advance what sessions you want to attend because when you decide ten minutes before it starts not only will you probably get lost trying to find it but when you do get there, it will probably be standing room only. If that occurs, do you really want to be the woman who freaked out from claustrophobia and ran screaming from the room. Not that it actually happened that way but I did have to leave at least one because OMG I know there was just not enough air that room for all of us.
3. Take care of yourself. If that means going to your room for quiet time or sitting outside to catch your breath (because everyone else seems to have stolen the air) or just meeting friends in a quiet place to talk. It is so easy to get overwhelmed. It is okay to just say no.
4. Unless you can clone yourself (and please don’t because there were so many people there already, y’all!), you cannot be at all places at all times. It is okay to miss some things. Live in the moment and you will have more fun and take so much more away from this amazing conference. You make it what you want it to be.
5. Sometimes you find yourself texting your roommate (and/or friends) non-stop saying “Where are you?” It is perfectly okay to lojack your roomie for simplicity in finding them in a crowded hotel. (Oh,sure, Busy Mom(The Original) says that borders on stalking but what does she know? She is still chipped just in case. I think her words were “It’s not stalking. It’s an intimate friendship.”) And? You may be surprised that every time you turn around the same person is there. It’s all good. Hug them. I am pretty sure Soapbox Mom was not stalking me. Or was she? Either way, we got about a million hugs in over the course of the weekend. Now, I miss not seeing her.
6. This conference is HUGE. A hotel with 1500 women is overwhelming. However, do not be afraid to go up to a blogger you admire and want to meet. Whether you have 11 readers a day or eleventy-hundred, we all like meeting new people. In fact, when I got on the elevator one day, I ran into Ree. She had the same shell shocked look most of us did. I asked her if she was overwhelmed with people talking to her and coming up to meet her. She said there really weren’t that many people who did just come up to introduce themselves. Luckily, I have no boundaries and had no problem gushing at her.
7. I always thought that Liz of This Full House was hard to understand because of that think Joisey accent. It turns out that is not the case. It is because she probably has a brownie shoved in her mouth. And? She may be losing her hearing because everytime I opened my mouth she replied with “What?” And we all know I do not have an accent at all. It must be her.
8. Maria and V (@veepveep) only seem scary. I mean, just because Victoria said she would cut me about a hundred times and Maria pulls no punches when she talks to you, they are awesome. If you did not meet them, you need to. They probably really won’t cut you. But you may get a weird package from UPS from V. Don’t open it. I’m just sayin’.
9. If you are going somewhere on a big bus meant to carry a lot of people and find it is too full for just a few more, jump on the chance to take the smaller Dork bus. Had I not done that, I would have missed out on meeting Miss Britt in person for the first time who in turn introduced me to Adam who is really a nice guy. (Shhhh, don’t tell!) As well as laughing with the other super cool Dork Bus mates. (Dork Bus Mates: Send me your urls so I can link you. My brain is too fried and I am too sick to look. And lazy. And a dork.) We had a blast laughing on that trip to Ford.
And one more for BlogHer ‘10:
10. Jory, Elisa and Lisa work really hard with an amazing staff to pull off an incredible conference. For you. Did you thank them? You should. Did you thank the staff? You should. Did you especially thank Lori Luna? If not, bow down and thank her with every ounce of thankfulness you have. She is a miracle worker and an advocate for you if things go a bit haywire.
I learned more but I know that all the cool kids do Top Ten bullet points so I have to stop. And there was so much more to say. Maybe later. Or not. I will have to think of 10 more things.
Guest post: An exclusive interview with Jenn’s arm
July 28, 2009
Hi! I am Jenn’s arm. Jenn is sleeping off BlogHer so I am guest posting for her. I sort of don’t have her permission to be posting here, so let’s keep this between us. Jenn has wonderful things to say about the amazing weekend that was BlogHer but trying to get her to form a coherent sentence is impossible. So when I was approached by “Oh No You Didn’t” Magazine to do an exclusive interview regarding the “swagontrovery” of BlogHer09, there was no way I could resist. Just don’t tell Jenn. She doesn’t want me to discuss it. And really don’t tell her I took over her blog. Thanks! Jenn will be back tomorrow to post.
—–
ONYD: So I have seen you around the Interwebs on Twitter and on blog posts. I must say, you’re not very attractive.
Jenn’s Arm: That was rude.
ONYD: I thought that was the point. My bad. Okay, so I have heard several versions of what happened to you. One blogger went as far as to say that those marks are you look like a result of shooting heroin. What do you have to say about that?
ONYD: Okay, so tell us in your own words what happened.
Jenn’s Arm: I was just hanging around when Jenn decided to go into the Expo area to actually talk to vendors. Apparently the eyes were not on the job because that place was packed. So, there I am just minding my own business when Jenn decides to go and do something dangerous and reckless like stop and carry on a conversation with a vendor about their product. I mean really! Who actually stops to talk to these people?! Grab and go! But no. As she stood there talking intently and was obviously not being rude or quick about it as she should have been, someone grabbed me from behind to get to the vendor’s swag.
ONYD: Wow! That must have been some rare or expensive stuff.
Jenn’s Arm: Not really. It might have been a bag with a pen or mouse pad or a sample of detergent in it.
ONYD: And that one person did that to you?
Jenn’s arm: No. The top bruise happened on a separate occasion from the one where you can clearly see the outline of the fingers that grabbed me. So, Jenn let me get marred so she could carelessly learn about a product she was unfamiliar with or carry on a conversation with some vendor. I mean, she could have used that time to let me grab stuff and elbow people out of the way. But, no. She just let me hang around.
ONYD: Did you see who did it?
Jenn’s arm: I am an arm. I don’t have eyes.
ONYD: You’re doing an interview.
Jenn’s arm: Shut up.
ONYD: Okay, moving on. Are you mad? Is Jenn mad?
Jenn’s arm: Jenn is not mad. She is heartbroken. Absolutely heartbroken. This put such an ugly light on a weekend that meant so much to her. She is sad. She is just very sad over behavior she saw, the backlash of it and what it has done to a community she truly loves with all of her heart. I feel bad for her heart, actually. You can’t see the marks on him like you can on me and they are deeper and longer lasting.
Am I mad? Oh, heck no! I am famous!
ONYD: Famous?
Jenn’s arm: Absolutely. I had paparazzi all weekend. My photo was taken more than Jenn’s. In fact, I have been approached for a book deal.
ONYD: No way! A book deal?
Jenn’s arm: Yeah. I even have a title. “Boom Boom Pow:An Expo-Say On the Quest for Swag” What do you think? Get it? Expo as in the Expo hall and Say as in I am saying what happened? Get it.
ONYD: Now you’re the idiot.
Jenn’s arm: I think this interview is over. Any last questions?
I do not want you to get the impression that I went to BlogHer and that one horrible blogger’s comment made it a bad experience for me. (And can I just say how much your comments and emails meant to me. Wow. You are the best readers ever! I mean it!)
This year’s BlogHer was probably one of the best. Any drama was saved for someone else’s mama. I stayed away from it and it stayed away from me.
I did learn some wonderful things at BlogHer. I shall now share them with you.
Trolley Cars are perfect for amateur pole dancing.
Okay, and here is where I confess something. Bib? The Michelin Man? Well, he sorta scares the crap out of me. After a traumatizing encounter in the vendor area where I ran from him and hid behind other vendor tables, I thought we had made peace. Not so much. Sunday…he came racing out of a building to get me again. Okay, he is all puffy and nice and would never hurt anyone. Or so they tell me. But look at my expression. I am SO NOT kidding around here. Go. GO AWAY BIB! (Matt? I do adore Matt. Not Bib.)
(Look! He comes racing out all “happy” and check out Mr. Tire Man all pointing and laughing.)
Of course no BlogHer is complete without a Jennster groping.
I even tried to steal myself a new baby but his mother (Julie of Mothergoosemouse) insisted that I give him back. She said the whole “finders keepers” and “calling dibs” totally does not count with her baby. Bummer because I totally fell in love.
Now don’t we make a cute couple?
And finally we end with a quiz for you. Watch the video and answer the question following.
What are we doing?
A) Being held captive by a minion of Bib’s.
B) Learning how to get our kids to school on time under any circumstances.
C) Who cares? Raymond was driving.
D) All of the above.
So that is just some of the hilarity that ensued at BlogHer this year. I have a post about the amazing things that blew me away coming up later today, but I thought after the previous post we could all use a laugh and real evidence that I had a blast.
(Disclaimer: To those who went to BlogHer and felt that in anyway they were snubbed, hurt or brushed off by me, please email me. I was overwhelmed. I mean between my adhd and my anxiety, there were times that I had to mentally shut down. And, yes, there were times that I would be having an amazing conversation with you and then BLAM I realized that what blog you wrote for. I was just enjoying talking to you and it did not click! I just liked you. So I ask you in all sincerity, if I hurt you or made you feel badly in anyway, please email and tell me. I never, ever want to make anyone feel hurt or upset by me. I really am not a bitch. I am just too emotional and get overwhelmed too easily. With over 1,000 brilliant minds and women there, it is hard to not take it in and absorb all of that energy. So when I was barreling down the hallway, it was tunnel vision in survival mode. Forgive me. But please let me know!)
—
I can’t tell you the number of times I have opened and closed this browser trying to find the right words to talk about BlogHer. I am not sure there are any that will capture what this year meant to me. I am a four-timer, so I have all of the conferences to compare it to. I can say that I walked away from this one with the most positive attitude and best experiences of any of the BlogHerCons that came before.
This year I went with an attitude that i would take care of myself and have my own agenda rather than be at the whim of the crowd or someone who may or may not have the time to be with me. I wanted to catch up with old friends, meet people I have been emailing with for ages and have never met face to face and to make new friends.
I was able to catch up with some old friends. Some I was just able to only hug in passing but we both knew that it was due to the insanity of the weekend and not a lack of desire to spend time together. Some people that I really wanted to meet, I missed in the chaos. I hope we find time to at least stay connected online. Most surprising and wonderful was meeting people I thought I would “enjoy” but ended up absolutely adoring them. I mean, blog stalking (in a good way) adoring them.
I had deep conversations with brilliant minds. I had nonsensical conversations with tons of laughter. I had brief chats that I wish had been longer. I had long conversations that I wish would have never ended. I even got to listen to a most awesome Southern boy accent tell me not to take out my friends while driving like a maniac. (An under control maniac.) And I was able to be traumatized by the Michelin Man.
And then there was the book signing at Macy’s.
Wow. I mean, it was a surreal experience and makes me look forward to more of those and to my own book coming out. Thank you to everyone who stopped by and bought a book and got it signed. (If you didn’t and are interested, contact me.) I had a blast with the whole experience. Thank you for making it so much fun.
All of that I just mention? I will write about in more depth because I want people to know how much they touched me and for those who didn’t go, that it IS for you and YOU do belong if you can go next year.
But I need to get something off of my chest that happened. Something that slammed me against a wall. It had nothing to do with BlogHer the conference. But with one person. The shame of writing about it is so intense but I have to get it out so it doesn’t continue to eat me alive.
And then there was after Macy’s. When I met the meanest blogger of the weekend. All I can say is I am glad that her nametag was either hidden or not on because I would call her out for her rudeness. Our conversation went a bit like this:
Her: HI!! I loved meeting you. I just love your writing. Your personality is even bigger in person than online! You look like you are having so much fun! You are awesome.
Me: (blown away by such kindness) Thank you…
Her: You totally don’t look like your pictures. I didn’t expect you to be fat. You really don’t look it. I mean, you never talk about it. It really surprised me! Really. I don’t mean that in a bad way. Your face and all is so pretty.
Me: uhhhhhhhh……
Her: I hope you don’t take that wrong or anything. *giggle*
Me: uhhhhhhhhh….Yeah, I have to go meet nice people in the bar now.
Seriously? Yes. Seriously. What do you say to that? I immediately went to the comfort of my friends (hoping to find one of them who would want to kick some ass) but I never said anything because really? Who wants to repeat a conversation like that after being devastated by it? I didn’t want to relive that humiliation.
I get it. I know that between my meds, my depression and my thyroid, I have put on way more weight than I want. More than I am comfortable. I have a mirror. I get it. But to have someone say that to me. Well? It absolutely crushed me. Ironically, my biggest fear about going to BlogHer and what really almost kept me from going until 2 weeks before was my weight gain and the fear that I would be judged harshly. I was assured no one was that mean. (WRONG!) (I don’t blame you kind people who convinced me to go. I am glad I did. And who knew someone like this would be there and be so mean??) I am going to hope and pretend this woman was high or drunk.
Why would someone do that? Answer me that. Why?
And if it was you who said it, email me. Because really? I need to know why you did that.
I promise, the good stuff is coming next. I just had to get that out. The inner turmoil of it was eating me alive. I may delete this as soon as I hit publish but maybe if I put it out there, it will take away the power that awful woman has had over my mind. Let it go. Move on. Right?
Friends don’t let friends IM after midnight. Or do Wii?
June 13, 2008
I don’t sleep well at night. So sometimes I get online and find people to talk to. Some are okay with it. Some play “IM dead” and pretend they are not there rolling their eyes.
One of my favorite late night chatters is my totally awesome and completely cool roomie for BlogHer ‘07 and yes again this year for BlogHer ‘08 (cause I didn’t scare her off!) is Busy Mom. Yes, she does have a real name. She can tell you herself. The sad thing is? She has WiiNis envy. (rhymes with another phrase and is pronounced wee-nus envy.) It is happening all over the country from people who are without a Wii.
This woman is living totally old school. Like make you want to weep and donate to the cause old school. Check out how pathetically old school Busy Mom is and how she needs to step at least into the 21st century but definitely into this decade. See? Total WiiNis envy. (Or is it WiiNis Envii?)
This is one of our late night conversations. And, yes, the silly had hit but the fun stuck around.
Me: I wrote a post: “I Wii Pii’ed myself when - got my Wii Fit”
BusyMom: Hahahaha!
Busy Mom: Charge the family a Fii to use it, money problem solved
12:03 AM me: Good idea for Mii
Busy Mom: Or, you could just let it Bii
me: Drop PiiTiiA and Bii Frii
I Sii
12:04 AM Busy Mom: Hii Hii Hii
me: Gii you are funnii
Busy Mom: Tii Hii, humor is Kii
12:05 AM me: We will get you a Wii this summer. I will buy thii a Wii to play. I can Sii you are Kii to the lovah of thii Wii and will Bii Frii to send Thii a Wii
12:06 AM Busy Mom: Whoopii!!
me: Yeah I am done. Out. Finii
Busy Mom: LOL
12:07 AM me: Have wii crossed the line into crazii? Because if wii shared this, they would sii that wii are wacked crazii
Busy Mom: Li’lol Mii?
me: My brain doth exploded
12:08 AM Busy Mom: My screen is all gooii, thanks
me: Now go! Work. I need to sii about deadlines for mii also.
Busy Mom: If it were graded, I’d get a Dii
me:Bii Good!12:13 AM Busy Mom: Okii Dokii!me: Nite sweetieSweetiiSwiitiiBusy Mom: Hii, Hii, Mwah!12:14 AM Busii Mom, over and outme: Mommii needs coffii out
I do not know why some of you ignore me when I IM you late at night. That is kind of rude. Look at the fun you would have chatting.
The final (yet in some ways first) wrap up of BlogHer ‘07
August 5, 2007
Okay, so I have finally regained my eyesight. (Last year the hotel tried to kill me. This year American Airlines did. After flight cancellations, a standby list of over 200 and finally catching the last flight out of Chicago, I made it home. With two severe eye infections. I was told there were ‘ulcers’ on my eyes. Ulcers. On my eyes. What the hell? So, computer time has been limited. Anyway…) Since this has the potential of being very long, I will break it down into sections that may make it more reader friendly.
The sessions
I was able to go to several sessions, though I did miss quite a few I wanted to go to. I obviously had to go to the State of the Momosphere session seeing as just 2 years ago a mom panel almost did not even happen because “Why would anyone go listen to what Moms have to say?” so Jenny, Meghan and I had to be convincing that the panel would in fact be a success. (It was!) Now, just 2 years later the Mom panel has become standing room only. (Go, Moms!) The other panels (or is it sessions?) I went to were very well moderated and had terrific panelists. They all were informed, entertaining and great speakers. Some sessions I enjoyed just listening and hearing other thoughts. Some were informative and I feel I really was able to walk away with new information that will benefit me. And there was one or two that I wasn’t sure I would enjoy at all and find myself listening intently to what was being said. One on a topic I knew nothing about but learned enough to want to hear more. And one that I was able to make excellent professional connections afterwards. All in all, the sessions I attended were well worth it. Even the closing political keynote. (Still, no need to be apologetic that I am from Texas, Ms. Edwards.) Those I was unable to go to had excellent live bloggers covering them not to mention the actual BlogHers who were there sharing what they learned. (Thank you live bloggers!)
My only regret is that you had to either stay from beginning to end to attend a session in each track or you had to choose what to miss if you had to head back to the hotel for any reason. Friday I spilled coffee all over myself which necessitated my heading back to the hotel. There goes a good hour. The location of the conference and the hotels were both amazing and I am not complaining. Just sad I missed a few sessions I wanted to go to.
The pranks, parties and pratfalls
By now I know you have heard about the story of the Stinky Cheese making the rounds at BlogHer. Great prank. When it wasn’t in my room. Or in my roommate’s bag. Or when I had to save the world from the Stinky Cheese. Otherwise, the horror, fear and trauma it caused was hilarious. I have never seen such dry heaves over cheese as I did at BlogHer. Seriously wrong. But seriously funny.
There were a lot of parties going on. I made it to a few, but not all. I am only one person with only one liver. Some of these parties were amazing and “all inclusive because we love all of our BlogHers” and some that were more exclusive and not pleased by all of the BlogHers who did not have official name-tags and were treated with disrespect after initially being welcomed in. And then of course there was the “what started as small but everyone is invited including that nice woman in the elevator who must want to join us because you are so cool and hip being at the W” party. Yes, the ever inclusive 2603 party. Most. Awesome. Inclusive. Party. (To be shut down by two of the hugest specimen of human males ever.) I got to get thrown out of a party! So college fun! Thanks, Y and Lena. Best burgers and drinks ever. Seriously. Never loved a burger more than the one that night.
And you would think that when you are in a group of friends and someone (I won’t mention names) accidentally has her wine glass fall out of her hands while in the lobby of the hip and trendy W lobby, her friends would make sure she is okay and all is right with the world. You would be wrong. The moment the glass hit the floor and before her “Oh shit” was bellowed across the lobby, we scattered like roaches at night when a light is flipped on. Gone. Abandoned her. In fact, I joined Biff and Barbie at the bar and totally pretended to be with them the whole time. They completely went with it and acted as if I was part of their date. So. Bad. In my defense, I did give said un-named person the rest of my wine. I mean, I am not totally cold. And the wine could have had the effect of making her forget we bolted. Doubtful but possible.
The crushes, the networking and the babies
How do I ever link to all of the amazing women I was able to meet for the first time, see again after a year or reconnect with after a year of emails, phone calls and shared experiences? I don’t know how I can. I would certainly leave someone out. I can’t do that. It would be wrong because everyone I talked to was so kind and so warm that I would be crushed if I accidentally left one out because I am still Blogstipated after the conference. However, if even one of you wants me to link to these wonderful women in a post, let me know and I will do it. You are all just that amazing. Oh, and if I introduced myself to you on numerous occassions, I am really not stupid. Not really. Just Over.Whelmed. To the point of having great conversations with a blogger I adore so much and then not even realizing it was HER the whole time. She of a blog I read daily. Okay, maybe I am stupid. So? Link in an entry or blogroll it? You tell me.
What about some authors that have helped me along the way as well? I can share with you that I did finally meet a friend who has helped me immensely with my book. Yes, I am talking about the wonderful Jen Lancaster. If you think she is funny and awesome in her books and on her blog, you are not even scratching the surface of how warm, funny and (sorry, Jen) nice she is in person. And the infamous Fletch. The man reminds me so much of my husband with how he “handles” Jen. (But can you really “handle” anyone named Jen/Jenn/Jenny/Jennifer? I don’t think so.) AND she and I are working on a Special Project that will be underway as soon as we get our manuscripts to a point where we can do it justice. Because, these book things we are working on are priority right now. We are excited, so pretend to be excited with us. I also was able to meet author Wendy McClure who not only gave me some incredible literary advice, but we shared some personal moments that both of us wish we were not in a position to be able to share together.
I would be remiss if I did not mention my incredible soul-sister roommate, Busy Mom. Did you know she has a real name and so does her family? Who knew? Let me tell you something about this woman. When trying to get her roommate out of bed, she found the perfect way to send me rolling out of bed laughing. How? By throwing open the infamous shuttered bathroom “window” and belting out The Sound of Music. Way more awesome than a wake-up call.
And a personal thank you to Izzy for staying up with me until 2:30am talking, decompressing and sharing our thoughts on blogging, life and the conference. I know I stole your sleep, but it meant a lot to have a quiet moment.
And the blog crushes I was able to meet in person. Numerous and incredibly nice and warm and open to any conversation breaking into that was going on. Instead of trying to link to every one of them, I am going to create a blogroll of them that I insist you go visit them. Insist. So look for me to put the blogroll up so that you can go read my crushes. They deserve your time.
I was finally able to meet Nataly of Work It, Mom! who interviewed me a while back for her Daring Females series. (Great interviewer, by the way.) We have emailed and such since I started working with them, but the face to face meeting was so nice. Especially when I was coffee-less and hungry and had the personality of a doorknob. And yet she still did not run from me regretting her decision to work together. Bless you, Nataly.
And oh, the babies. So many adorable babies. They made my uterus twitch for more. Of course, my husband’s radar went off from many, many states away with one phone call declaring, “I sense you are around babies. No babies. Do not touch the babies. No, Jenn. No!” Damn male baby radar super sense of his! I kissed heads of many babies. One of which I did not realize was nursing at the time and even though I got permission from his mom, I felt badly about interrupting his meal. I kept asking what vendor booth had the adorable babies as swag, but no one would tell me. AND none of them would let me “borrow” theirs for a few years. (Selfish new moms and their silly attachments to their babies.) But, unlike in prior years, I did not once have to seek out a baby for a desperate lactating mom. They all had either babies or pumps to relieve their agonies. (Yeah, for the pump & dump!)
And, finally, the swag.
I just learned this year that swag stands for Stuff We All Get. Learn something new all the time. I am so easily impressed. I really only have one thing to say about the swag. Okay, I never have one thing, but something to keep in mind…it was FREE. You did not shell out $20 for every item in your bag. No one duct taped you to a chair and made you proclaim your undying love and devotion to it. It is swag. And pretty good, in my book. The break and shake martini glass. How fun is that? Loved it. And the potholder? Please, like I cook? But I have it and will use it. (To hand to my husband when he cooks.) Nothing was trashed. Nothing was dissed. Nothing was unappreciated. If you hated it, then pass it to the person beside you. They may really need/want/covet it. Just remember that it isn’t a person to person swag bag. No one size fits all bag of goodies. Love it or hate it, at least you got it. /end soapbox
Final thoughts
Great job to everyone involved in planning this conference. It was amazing. You pulled off a great event.
Amazing BlogHers I was able to spend time with: I miss you already. I mean, I really do. Call me? *grin*
[Update] I totally forgot to add…AND I had my very own lap dancer. I feel so shamed to have forgotten her. My bad!
Okay, so I never did a real BlogHer wrap up and though I know many of you are tired of it, I am doing one anyway.
First: Hi! I’m Jenn and I am from Texas. (No need to apologize for that Elizabeth Edwards. I am proud of my state.) That being said (since it wasn’t in a video and I was not given a chance to say it outloud, I am glad to have that out of my system), let’s move along.
I have to be honest when I say I almost did not go to BlogHer this year. After a lot of stuff happened between last October and this July, I just wasn’t sure. However, at the gentle request of some friends (and when I say gentle request of course I mean they threatened me with bodily harm if I did not go), I decided on Monday that I would in fact go and was on a plane by Wednesday. I am luckily one of the few that did not have airline troubles…on my way there.
Having arrived after 10:00pm at the ever so chic and hip W, I realized they are PEPSI people. This girl here is a Diet Coke gal. So I frantically rushed the front desk begging them to lead me to a Diet Coke. They told me I could pay about $100 at the bar or walk down two blocks to a 7-11.
I just stared at her. Two blocks? Like city blocks? In a big city? After a few moments of what must have looked like small town terror, the nice one (there was a nasty one there, too) reached out and touched my arm stating, “I am from Indiana and it is totally NOT scary. Just go!” *whew* I would not be killed to get a Diet Coke. (Of course when I saw an elderly couple walking ahead of me on the sidewalk, I got right up behind them–as in could smell his Old Spice cologne– and walked “with” them. Hey, I was tired and in a new city past dark. And remember, I AM from Texas (no apology needed).
Having stocked up on my DC, I eagerly went to crash in my room. But there was this THING that, personally, freaked me the hell out. A black fuzzy (and I am assuming hip and trendy) fuzzy cube staring at me. I think it mocked my accent. I decided to give that bed to Busy Mom the next day. No cube is going to take me out in the middle of the night.
As soon as I got cozy in my bed in my pj’s, Jenny called and told me to come up and dish in her room. Not being of the hip and trendy W crowd (Texas girl…no apology necessary), I just threw on my pink Croc flip-flops (Susan said it was totally okay since I was in my pajamas and that is about all they are good for) and raced to elevator where I encountered a man who was hip and trendy and all W-ish. He looked at me. I looked at him. Then in a conspiratorial whisper said, “Panty raid on the 20th floor, dude.” He was a bit horrified and probably a tad scared of me. Croc flops do that to a person. Anyway, I crashed Jenny’s room where we dished and ate $100 Snickers bars from the “honor” bar. That would be one of the few quiet moments of the weekend.
After returning to my room I pulled down the shade. You know the ones to darken the room? Yeah, but see then there came this gawd awful noise outside. Like someone dragging an 18-wheeler up the side of the building. In my attempt to check it out, the shade fell on my head. Fell. On. My. Head. But only half of it and not the bar itself, just the shade part.
I begin to literally dance around in panic. “Oh crap! Oh crap! I broke The W!” After climbing on the chair and wrestling with the son-of-a-bitch for about an hour, I finally got it rolled back up. Dirty and sweaty and in need of a chemical spray down, I was officially exhausted. And it was 3:00am. The noise was just thunder. All that for THUNDER? That is like a normal sound in Tornado Alley here in Texas (no apology needed), but it sounded…different.
The next morning arrived with glee and joy. Oh wait, I mean exhaustion and exhaustion, but I was so excited to meet my roommate and get this party started I immediately threw on clothes to go in search of real coffee. In my glasses-less state, I totally looked right at Chris Jordan and kept walking. Totally NOT a snub. Just blind and coffee-less. (Love you, Chris!) It wasn’t until I was showered, had my coffee fix and could see again that I joined the lovely ranks of the BlogHers that had arrived already. The day was a blur of going here and there and meeting and greeting amazing women. (I will link, but I am just so brain fried, not right now.) I had lovely conversations at the cocktails parties BlogHer provided and met women I have only hoped of meeting in person and acted like a total stalker. I am okay with that, too. Sorry to any I scared.
I do remember the RANK ass smell in my room, though. Personally, I thought Lindsay had stomach issues after using our bathroom. What can you do when you have a bathroom with shutters and a barn door?
And then we had the Whiskey Bar. Oh, the Whiskey Bar. (Photo courtesy of mammK Kimberly who lifted it from someone else.) That is a post in and of itself. Let the pictures do the talking. I got an impromptu tattoo and hung out with fun people and screamed so much to be heard of the hip and trendy music that I lost my voice.
In my next post I will talk about the actual sessions. (I am pretty sure that was the purpose of this conference.) The Lisa Ling experience. Getting lost on the Miracle Mile. And having my roommate sing me awake to the Sound of Music. Meeting Jen Lancaster live and in person and slipping my hotel key to her husband. Having amazing conversations with other authors who gave me great advice and support. (Wendy and Ariel and even Amy Sedaris.) And I came home with new jobs. Rock it!
Will you care if I write more of a wrap up later? Because I want to. I really do!
For now, I have to go do my “real” work and make those big bucks!
I am still suffering from a BlogHer intensity hangover. And I am blind in one eye and half in the other. So, while I mull over the entry that will recap BlogHer, I will at least send you to a few pictures that I took.
I am eager to update you all about people I met, things I saw, things I smelled and just my general impressions. It was a different year for me this year and that was a good thing. Anyway, go look at pictures. (And if you have any pictures of BlogHer, let me know and send me to them!)
I tried to caption them, but my eyes are in agony. (More on that later.) The more I sit at the computer, the more they hurt, so I gave up after a while. Please feel free to add notes, captions and comments. I would love that. It does not mean I do not know who you are. It means I love you, but my eyesight sucks and it HURTS to look at the screen. Because you know I love you best.
I have heard that there are a lot of fans of the Wii. (Can you believe I said that with a straight face? I don’t know anyone who has played Wii without loving it. In fact, I have a whole set of pictures of a family party at the beach playing the Wii. Stay tuned for links.) I have also read the documents on how to set it up. I was shocked that there was no mention as to how to play this modern miracle of technology in the car.
Now, I know that there is a huge segment of parents who believe that the car is the best place to “communicate” with their children. Ha! When driving from Texas to Florida, I am all about the beauty of technology. And am willing to try anything. Apparently so are my children.
You see a prime example of how my children love technology enough to not care how uncomfortable it is. Now, one of the things I love about the Wii is that it gets you off of you butt and onto your feet to play. However, I also love that the game is so much fun to play that the kids insisted that we unpack it to try to play it in the car. (We took it to Florida for days like these.) So, being the “Please let me listen to my tunes and zone out while I drive this motley crue across county” type of Mom, I agreed.
Let me just share with you the love of my Wii. I heart it. I slept with it one night but Clint said no more of that. He said it was crowded sleeping with my Senseo, my laptop and my Wii. (Can you blame a girl? I love my toys!)
So for anyone who may be wondering, “Is a Wii for me?” Hell yeah, baby! I mean… certainly it should be a considered product to purchase.
—-
Now on to topics beyond technologicalizing my children. (Yes, I do love making up words. Why do you ask?) I have seen a lot of fun entries around the net. Guessing the truth or the lie. Asking me anything and I have to answer it honestly. Paying for you to comment. (Not really on that last one. You have been great! I have heard from my niece AND my coffee neighbor. Tickles me all pink and purple and a little bit of cyan.) What do you want? I mean, I will still write the babble-assing posts, but I want to know if you want to know anything. Do you?
—
Okay, so it looks like BlogHer might not happen for me. It is at least on hold for a while. After getting a severe punch to the gut financially, I am not going to buy a plane ticket until a week before BlogHer at the soonest. Anyone in DFW want to go to BlogHer and make it a road trip? Anyone between here and Chicago want to get picked up and finish the road trip? Honestly, I had questions about going, but now that I am set on it and am over the moon about friends I know that are going, I want to be there. So, honestly, if you want to road trip it, let me know. I am up for it. (At least I keep trying to tell myself that I am.) Are you?
And here, my friends is yet another pretty picture to keep you loving me and being patient while I play around with my blog.
